Have you already had your fill of “love” for the month? I admit that I enjoy sending holiday cards to family and friends, because who doesn’t enjoy getting some mail? Let’s face it, it’s really easy to love the people you like, but what about the people you don’t like? You know exactly the ones I am talking about.
I am going to be honest. There are people that annoy me and people I just don’t like. I struggle with the “love thy neighbor” commandment every now and then (sometimes more frequently than others- I swear God made teenagers to test our patience!). How can I love them when they annoy, frustrate, or upset me?
I look around in the world and I don’t see countries, people, or neighbors in my neighborhood loving each other, why should I? Well, a simple answer is- there is a commandment, so God told me to. There’s even the bracelet that says WWJD. Jesus would probably not make snarky comments about others, offend people, or be mean on purpose.
My go-to when people frustrate me is to pray for them. Years ago, I had a boss who seemed nice at the beginning. Over time though, she would lie and talk behind your back- you couldn’t trust her. Unfortunately, I worked closely with her and it difficult to keep up the nice facade. One day I started praying for her and kept on praying until she didn’t bother me (much) anymore.
Another time, I had a student, a quick witted 9th grader who just rubbed me wrong. I could tell that I was not her favorite either. I’m not a fan of conflict so not getting along with people doesn’t always go well. How did I turn that around? Well, I always stood at the door greeting my students when they entered. I started giving her compliments every day, very superficial at first, clothes, hair, anything I could notice about her. After awhile, her attitude towards me became much more pleasant, my compliments became more about her character and work, and to my surprise by the end of the year, we were getting along.
The moral of this story is that you can’t like everyone, and everyone certainly can’t like you. What you can do however is change the way you deal with them. You can pray for them, find something good about them, or even better, ask them how they are and listen to the answer. A genuine answer to that question may explain why they are how they are. It may lead you to understanding and yes, loving them better even when you don’t like them very much. After all, what would Jesus do?
