“It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35) Is it? Who decides? Both are equally important. That’s a bold statement and I’m happy to explain. It is blessed to give. We are called to give to our families, our neighbors, and those less fortunate than we are. Deus caritas est. (God is charity/love)
Often when you hear the word “giving” you think of giving money, but there are so many ways to give besides money. You could make a meal, call someone, sit in Adoration, teach Sunday school, do crafts with kids, the list is long. The most precious thing you can give another person is your time and attention. When was the last time you sat down with your child/parent/spouse/significant other with no distractions and just listened?
In December 2018, a young lady walked into my classroom at the end of the semester to say goodbye before vacation and chat. I was “too busy” getting ready for my class to stop and talk with her, give her a hug, and tell her to have a good vacation. I had those moments of time to give her, and I did not. I had no idea at that moment that she would go to heaven a few days before Christmas. Her birthday is this month, and I remember her incredible kindness and pray for her family. That loss taught me to be more present, to use my time.
Receiving the kindness and generosity of others takes its own special grace. This can be much harder because most people I know don’t like to get “help”. When you are going through a hard time, it’s difficult to allow others in because we think we can “handle” it. You probably can but do you have to do it by yourself? No. Allowing others to support you in the ways they are able is how they give love to you. You’re never alone in whatever you are going through; unless you choose to be.
This became apparent after my dad passed away in 2011. I was away from my classroom for more than two weeks. My colleagues and former colleagues made lesson plans, taught my classes, and kept my students/classroom afloat. When I returned there were cards from the kids, teachers, a collection of gift cards so I didn’t have to cook, and one of my colleagues made me lunch for an entire week. I said to a friend “It’s too much, I can’t accept this”. My friend’s response was “I can’t take away your grief and your loss, but I can make you lunch. Just receive the gift, that’s all you have to do.” I’ve never forgotten her words.
Give generously, receive gracefully. That’s the lesson and the challenge of loving others. Are you up for it?
